There has been some complaing about the unclear nature of some of my blog posts. I want you all to know that if my post does not make sense it is intentional. You may ask me about the meaning behind my words and if I see value in sharing I will. Otherwise you have my permission to attach any meaning to it would you like. Slander me. Analyze me. Construct me. Deconstruct me. Or if you can manage to, do the same or worse to yourself. Yes, I know we are living in a fact based society, but honestly ask yourself why you need to know? I would rather you misunderstand me than allow myself to be restricted coherent posts. There are always things in ones life that are not to be shared with others, or only to be shared with a select few. At time I use this blog to share things in my life that feel I can not comfortably divulge. So you get analysis without the subject being openly declared. Maybe you will find meaning in the analysis. What I won't say is "I don't care if you understand, because I write for myself." If I said that it would a a half truth, because often I don't care if you understand but I do not write only for myself. If I did then the contents of this blog would be written in a locked journal instead tucked away beneath my neatly folded socks nestled in my precious new dresser drawer. Oh look at me giving away all my secrets.

An Early Morning Post

I bought a dresser on Saturday. A place to store my clothing. A place for them to call home. I hope that someday I am as lucky as they are. Over the last little while I have been thinking about what it is that I truly want from life and I do know. It will come as a disappointment to most of my friends, but I want the same things I wanted a few months ago. The very same things I left to find. Although I did not find what I was looking for at the time I am plotting ways to find it again. I can not tell you why I am drawn to Saskatchewan. Perhaps it is a place to clear my head, and to focus on what it is that needs attention in my life. I seek to find a place of seclusion. Which to be honest here in my nest far away from everyone I almost have what it is that I want. One close friend calls it my sanctuary, and I must agree. But there are things that I can not have here that I could have there. Although there would be sacrifices I have been there and I have tasted what it is that I want, and I must say it is worthwhile. I am doing my time here and waiting for the day that I can break loose. That is going to take quite a bit of time. So much time that I may find another path. But I am plotting my escape. Yes, it would be an escape...I won't deny that. But and escape for the right reason. The reason? Now is the time for me to truly focus on getting what it is that I want and need, and that can only be done if I am able to live without distraction for a little while. I am alone, but not lonely, and I need it to be this way.